Having an 'extended' break... I feel disoriented... Like I dunno what to do after lessons.. I don't even remember what I used to do on Monday afternoons before the break... I shall do work... soon...

I hate it when people in a group don't do their part for a project... I don't mind it when people push back the dateline within a reasonable frame, yet not when one makes empty promises. Please.. 1 week is definitely long enough to come up with a half page write up... I simply cannot think of any excuses...

It pisses me off because I'm the one doing the compiling... and I can't put everything together is some parts are missing. Darn... 'A's don't just fall from the sky.. you need to work for it... and at the rate I am going, I bet there is gonna be a lot of missing stuff from the first draft of the report...

On a happier note... Claire... I finally broke your Bejewelled high score... Mwahahaha... I think it not only requires skill... but luck plays quite a big element in it too... Yay!!!

Hols are drawing to an end... Well, nth on the work slate.. but plenty on the enjoyment side... I finished a book, watched a movie, sang karaoke for 9 hours, talked to a fren for a whole day, went shopping, bought a CD, applied for my campus account... and slacking away at the com. The only school related thing I did was probably my AS meeting.. at least we got our direction...

Quite an accomplishment on the slacking side I think... Now that I am recharged, I will use the past week's activities as a reminder that I should start studying, writing my paper, doing my projects and what not.. MWahahaha...

Just came across the script for this clock thingee cursor? I think it is kinda interesting...

OK man.. time to clean up... I shall do work these 2 days... and stop blogging.. I realise I have been blogging alot this pass week... It is the next best thing to doing work lar... So yeah.. I would rather write...

I was about to sleep.. until I went to check my mail... Straits Times is gonna charge a subscription fee for their online newspapers... Sigheth... Ok.. I admit I don't usually read the online version of the papers coz I have the actual one at home.. But it is good in the sense that I can just download or copy the article I want instead of cutting it out from the newspapers... And it is good to browse articles when I'm in school...

The online version doesn't even have my daily comic strips!!! Bah!

Watch Constantine today... well, my first movie since... eh.. I forgot when... I can't even remember my last movie... I gues it is sth watched during the last hols... Wow... That's long...

I felt that the show was not too bad... Keanu Reeves was spot on as the dark, brooding protagonist... and yeah... I felt that some parts of the movie was more like a horror movie than a thriller... They really know how to use shick tactics. Mwahahaha... I was like the only one who screamed in the cinema when sth shocking happened. Super malu lar...

I think the show is quite worth it... it's a good mix of humour... and lameness... and horror, gore, religious themes, suspense, twists and well, 1 main underlying theme. Well.. a hunk as a leading actor and a babe for the female protagonist... It seems to have almost everything in them... Thought provoking definitely...

Well, I shall go sleep now... Cause... I feel like it? Hahaha... Early ar... but since my room is in pitch darkness (moi sis is sleeping) except for light coming from my laptop, I think I shall not spoil my eyes any further... Plus I have to stuff those round blu-ish transparent things called contact lense into my eyes tmr morning for a cornea check up.. So I shall be considerate to my eyes and not tire them out too much...

Am doing research in the middle of the night... But I'm so wide awake... Considering that I've only been awake for 8 hours... It's like waking up at 9am in the morning and it's 5pm in the evening only. Shall try and finish my research soon... then maybe I'll not feel so guilty about not doing much this hols... and hopefully, I'll feel tired enough for a 'nap'

Got a project meeting at 1030 tmr... I need to wake up early!!!

Oh.. and Constantine!!! Yeah!! can't wait... oh.. and Hitch looks funny...

Mid Week Check

Hmmmm... let's see what I have done these few days... After spending time at the chalet over the weekend, the other things I've done is to finish a novel by Jeffrey Archer - Kane and Abel, a book on how 2 men, one rich and poor end up vying against each other because of a small misunderstanding/misinterpretation... Kinda disappointed by the ending but then again the twist was good...

Eh.. went for a whole night of karaoke... and been trying to beat Claire's score on my Bejeweled game...

This means I'm so screwed for the rest of the week... Okiez... to start work...

I just had my first meal of the day... Yeah.. ocnsidering that it started at 5... Mwahahaha.. .at this rate, I'll not be in school on Monday... but then again.. I have a project meeting at 930 tmr... So looks like I die die have to wake up early...

My throat feels tired from singing so much last night... I don't even feel like singing along to the songs when my media player is blasting them... And i think the harmonising thing is quite addictive... When I listen to a song, I'll try to harminise... But try is the key word lar... Hahahaha... Don't think I'll go for another singing session so soon..

Just got an SMS.... my meeting is pushed later... yay!!! 1 more hour of sleep... I gotta start doing work... Looking for fallacies...

Can anyone advise...

P1: Citizens above 50 will get a lower percentage of their salary put into CPF.
P2: If less money is put in CPF, those above 50 will take home more money.
P3: The amount of tax one has to pay is determined by the amount of money one takes home.
SC1: Those above 50 will have to pay high tax.
P4: Those above 50 should not be allowed to pay more tax

Conclusion: Tax rates for those above 50 should be cut.

Is the above a fallacy???

Hmmmm.. it;s almost 7,, a quick post before I go to sleep to document this momentous night...

Yeah.. you read right... I'm going to sleep... I just got home actually... about half an hour ago... was out singing KTV with frens.. wah.. after like 9 plus almost 10 hours, we STILL can't finish the songs we wanted to sing... artistes like Harlem Yu and SHE... Sigh.. I sound damn hardcore lar... Anyway, this kind of marked the first time I stayed out the whole night without having a chalet or hotel stay as an excuse... Yeah... my parents are kinda strict bout these stuff... but today, my mum said i fi really wanted, I could stay out and stuff... Hmmm... More freedom as I grow older?

Anyway, so as I was taking the first North-bound train home, I saw people or rather students i ntheir uniforms preparing for school... It was kind of weird that while I just ended my day, others are starting theirs...

For a while, I kinda wished that I was part of that routine again... Yeah... I may sound nuts.. but nvm... Like one of my fren said, I'm feeling like that cause 'I am now a visitor to the routine and not a 'regular' anymore'... Well, couldn't agree more with her...

Yawn... shall really tuen in now... or i'll only wake up when the sun sets... and I still have other stuff to do... So ya.. Night world...

I love late night bitching sessions... I can forsee my body clock going topsy turvy this hols again... But I like chatting late into the night, replying mail, reading stuff... Ok... shall turn in soon..

Good Night World...

I just realised I have no frontpage after I reformatted my laptop... Sheesh... I took 2 months to figure that out... Oh ya.. look forward to a new layout.. I'm kinda sick of my cake pic... (Yeah.. it is a cake I baked... not some donut!!!)

Hmmm... looking forward to a week of recuperation. I'm gonna sing!!! I'm going out!!! I'm going shopping!!! I don't care... I NEED retail therapy... ya.. and of course catch up on projects and stuff... Yeppies...

And DARN!!! I wasn't on the lucky winners who struck anything in the CNY Toto draw last week...

Hahaha... My mum's friends at over at my place and I'm super amused with this kid. he is 6 and he is the typical cute small boy... *screams and gushes!!!* That's what I like about life... there are always 2 sides to it.. Good and bad, Happy and sad (it rhymes!!!). I shall amuse myself with him... tatata...

I miss having an internet connection… Ok.. I was too lazy to walk to the lobby or to Macs @ East Coast in the middle of the night to surf the net… Mwahahaha…

Well, the whole thing is over and done with… No more dreaming about it days before the activity. I really feel as if a huge burden is lifted off my shoulders. I don’t want to think about the repercussions and stuff...Well, to say the thing was successful will be seriously lying through my teeth.

The last 2 days or even the past week has been an emotional roller coaster. I love the people around me who have been giving me so much support.. yet at the same time, there were also some who went back on their words and stuff like that… Oh.. I love my dad!!! Which dad would bother to drive from Novena to Geylang to pick up food, then deliver it to East Coast for his daughter? Thinking of it just makes tears well in my eyes… So any ideas what to give him for a birthday present?

I should just get a phlog… I forgot so many things I wanted to say liaoz…

I dunno lar. I think I’m too numb to feel upset… Seriously, I didn’t eat much the whole night. I just had no appetite. I don’t feel like doing anything I admit it was fun at times.. Like when we were talking to the profs or singing along to guitar or sth… but after that… you look at stark reality… The world you constructed just comes crashing down…

Have been experiencing a lot of cognitive dissonance these few days too. It’s like trying to reconcile and justify what I think and what I have done.

I shall not mince my words here… Because this is MY blog… and I want to say whatever I feel like saying here… I shall not be hypocritical or fake like the many ppl out there… I don’t think I fared very well as a leader… Serious... but don’t worry.. I’ll get over it and bounce back stronger than before… I made a few mistakes which I will definitely learn from it…

1) Never give in too much to people. Sometimes, they will just take too much advantage of you till you end up doing everything

2) If others don’t have an opinion, don’t really assume they don’t. Make sure they can commit to help you and stuff before you embark on any mission because you really need their support.

3) There is this phrase called ‘delegation of tasks’

4) Don’t think I am superwoman!

5) A wrong decision kills… Like very badly…

Oh well. End of report… I just wish things had turned out differently… But I also refuse to blame myself wholly for it. I think I put in more effort than anyone else to run this thing and it is just bad that things didn’t turn out as planned. Life will still go on. I just wished I had the chance to do it again.

Am happy once again... Feeling a lot of emotional ups and downs this week... Kinda weird.. I think I have never felt so emotional since I don't know when.. Must be the stress...

But just checked my email... There's this prof who is actively helping me promote the event... SO SUPER SWEET!!!! and he is not even a Prof from Social Science .He teaches Econs... Although response is still here and there.. but I really appreciate what he is doing...

Hmmm.. 'nuff said... I need to pia AS and pack my stuff...

So till tonight!!! Hahaha... Costa Sands has free internet 24 hrs... Expect me!!!

Ok.. I survived 2 tests... Really enjoy studying into the night... But that's not exactly the point I guess... But I'm so mentally drained, I don't even feel any emotions regarding the outing anymore... I seriously can't be bothered... i'm so sick and tired of it and I think it's all my fault... Bad planning? not being able to see the whole picture? Guilty as charged...

Bleahz... Let's cross our fingers and hope that everything will be fine... At least a turn out of 30 ppl?

Disclaimer: Relax.. I'm ok... I just needed to get it off... Don't worry so much ya...

Hmmmm... a big thank you to friends who cared... Thanks for the support... I'm fine liaoz... really... I'm sure we'll pull this off... It's just a culmination of tests, projects and stuff that got me short on my fuse that day...

Feeling at peace with myself... I don't know why also.. Though I still have more than half to study for social psychology... Not kidding really... but then so far I have been quite successful in remembering stuff covered in class... Looks like I was wrong about social psych lessons... =)

Ok.. back to the books... or else tonight really don't have to sleep liaoz...

Hmmmm... V-day came and went... Had an enjoyable dinner... Pity I didn't go sing K... even though I also didn't do much work at home.. but I guess I will feel more guilty if I had went with you guys to sing.. Mwahahaha... Oh well.. there's always the next time...

11 hours before the end of CT... presentation... wish me luck... Ok.. 1 more chapter of social psych before I retire for the night... ;)

Dearest Friends.. Kindly remind me NEVER EVER to bite off more than I can chew... and also.. to NOT EVER PROCRASTINATE again.. Oh.. how I detest that word... although I think it is more of the procrastination that drove me to the state I'm in now... 5 days of CNY hols wasted.. *Kapoot*.. down the drain.. What have I accomplished? Close to nth... a small percentage of what I ams supposed to finish and do... Bleahz...

None of the democracy stuff is going in... and I realise that social psych is not as easy as it seems... My prof notes seems sparsed which means I gotta do my own notes... I'm switching form democracy to social psych and back within hours... which can be quite traumatic...

Arghz!!! I need 48 hours a day for the next 4 days... Hmmm... on hindsight.. it may not even be enough!!! Ok... enough whining... I just needed to get this off my chest before I sleep... Lessons @ 1015 tmr... how i lurve my dad... =)

The cut on my finger has became an ugly red welt... Been super unproductive.. Took a whole afternoon to read a democracy reading... Sianz... Not working hard as usual... But then again.. I'm clearer on some stuff... Just that I need to commit them to memory... 1 more day.. Gambate!!!

Well.. obviously studying is not the only thing on my mind this weekend... but I'll just try my best to balance the 2.. .well.. I feel like I'm in sec sch, trying to cram for tests/exams the night before... Mwahahaha... Hope everything will be fine.. if not, I'll just have to write a better paper/ mug harder for finals for demo, give a better presentation/research/work harder for finals for social psych.. and err... screw CT!!! Mwahahaha...

Kinda peeved... esp when ppl dun reply your emails... which are explicitly stated URGENT!!! GaH!!! but then again... Another person just made my day... So there.. you win some, you lose some...

Hmmmm.. I like it when the words which I want to write start flowing... Gillian is a happy girl today....

I wanna watch Constantine!!!

Hmmm... it's the 3rd day of the new year.. It's 12.33 at night.. Not sleeping yet cause... I gotta mug? Mwahahaha... been slacking too much the past 2 days... See ar.. even though I'm not going visiting this year, my relatives could visit me... so what I did yesterday was to rot in front of my laptop playing games... ;) and after that, at about 1 plus plus... I went to play Mahjong after my relatives left with my siblings.. Kinda funny... As it was late and stuff, there was a game my sister had one tile less.. so obviously she couldn't game... and then the very next game, it was my turn to be missing a tile... I guess we were too tired.. but we persisted and after some breaks to minch on food, we ended one whole round at 4 plus... Hahaha...

Oh.. and reunion dinner with my extended family was nice too... I thought it would be kinda weird at first cause I'm not exactly that close to my cousins... so we were just politely sitting therewatching TV... but afterwatching The Rat Race at about 12.30am, we started playing dai dee.. and bridge... and it went on to Mahjong again... Mwahahaha... so after playing Mahjong for like 2 days, my hands are not that itchy anymore... ;) Hmmmm... but we din bet any money... It's just a social game... hahaha... Hahaha.. we left at about 1 plus... almost 2am if I'm not wrong...

Hmmm.. so many updates... The Amazing Race ended it's run yesterday... I didn't want Freddy and Kendra to win... but then again.. it's all about luck... Oh well.. another month to the next season.. Yippee!!! well.. Survivor is back... and I have Desperate Housewifes and American Idol to watch currently...

Oh well.. time to start digesting some democracy... Good Night world...
Have sweet dreams.. and a Happy New year!!!

Chinese New Year is here... 祝各位：新年快乐， 心想事成， 身体健康， 万事如意， 财源滚滚， 事事顺利。。。

Yeppies!!! Time to pig out... Pineapple tarts, Bak Kwa... Love Letters... Kui Lapis!! Moi favourite... Oh.. and mixed nuts... Mandarin oranges included...

Hmmm.. realise I don't have like sweets or cookies at home... Mwahahaha... but then again, I will spend a quiet new year at home. Had reunion dinner last night... going for another one later... Pigging out lar...

But it's nice having reunion dinner... Steam boat.. with loads of food... and then bantering at the table. It's nice that we sit down as a family to eat... Felt that I haven't done it for a long time.. Especially since I was out late the last few nights.. Hahaha... Coupled with a 'high' sister... It was funny...

In class now... stoned... I got a miserable blog.. I realise I have been complaining in my last few entries... Hahaha... But I believe life has it's ups and downs... You'll be happy on some days, miserable on others, stressed on some and hyper on next... I thik it is a cycle... Though I feel that when happy things happen to me, I tend not to blog it.. but when I'm upset, my blog becomes an outlet...

I think we should all look at happier stuff and blog about them... ;)

It's been a long day... I shall happily say that my CT project is finishe.d. Now for the presentation.. Well, the can's not really done.. but we've tried our best... Hahaha... Anyway, I think it is quite a feat when you imagine 4 girls trying to do such mechanical stuff.. and plus majority of the groups was from arts stream.. Ok. No offence to Arts people here... Even me with my science stuff can't do much about the calculations.. It's more of trying to 'see' it!!!

Finally, everything about the outing is kind of settled.. Really glad for the people who have been around supporting me... and of course to others who have been patiently listening to my whining... Now awaiting the proposal.. ;)

Thinking whether I should go out for dinner on V-day... a lot of stuff to do leh.. but then again... it's kind of miserable to spend V-day alone... not that I have another half to spend it with... but at least with my frens.. It'll be nice...

I feel off my bike today... eh... like my 1st time... Maybe not fall... I was turning... or as Siyi said, swerving right when this guy came chrging towards me on his bike at top speed. I shall conclude that he is trying to show off... Anyway... he kind of tumbled and rolled forward.. while I was trying hard to balance myself... Ok.. in the end he was unhurt, and I end up with 2 very nice, deep-looking cuts... GreAt!~!~ It's kinda gross to look at it lar... it's like the skin got tore apart like 2mm maybe... but i dun thin kit is that deep.. shall apply some antoseptic later... *ouch!* it will hurt later when I bathe... :(

Yeah.. what pissed me off was that he put the blame all on me... and he was more concerned about some stupid thing at the front of his bike that costs 200 freaking bucks (maybe for him to show off) instead of me!!! IdI@T! ok.. I just like the '@' sign there... Luckily I didn't scrap my knees..

word of caution: don't go cycling when you are sleepy.. I had trouble trying to peddle my bike today... my legs are aching... Yeah.. lack of exercise... Luckily I dodn't develop any phobias for bicycles... Don't think I grew much darker even though the sun was blazing...

Somehow, I think it's gonna rain during CNY... as it has been almost every year. Why? Cause the sky was threatening to rain the last 2 days.. but somehow, the blazing sun will always shine through... So if it rains during CNY, remember, you read it here first!

Shall go clean my wounds and then go sleep... I'm super tired... Making a trip to East Coast tmr again... If I can wake up earlier tmr, I can squeeze in some time for studying democracy. after that, I 'll be trying out how to do my pringles can.... Wish me luck... Do or die.. 1 more week to presentation!

Another stone for me to trip over... Can't believe I'm looking at the outing stuff barely 7 hours after I stopped last night... nvm.. happier times are in sight... Going out later...

You Are a Peacemaker Soul

You strive to please others and compromise anyway you can.War or conflict bothers you, and you would do anything to keep the peace.You are a good mediator and a true negotiator.Sometimes you do too much, trying so hard to make people happy. While you keep the peace, you tend to be secretly judgmental.You lose respect for people who don't like to both give and take.On the flip side, you've got a great sense of humor and wit.You're always dimplomatic and able to give good advice. Souls you are most compatible with: Warrior Soul, Hunter Soul and Visionary Soul

What Kind of Soul Are You?

Made a stupid mistake today!!! Shouldn't have been too anxious to send out the email... Now it's gonna be quite stupid if I gotta retraqct it.. Ah well.. Gillian.. sth on the learning curve... Shit! Why did Sentosa do away with their big and nice chalet? Those 12 beds-2 bedroom kind... Now we are stuck with a room for 2 persons max according to costa sands website.. totally don't make sense.. can I just spend the night by the beach, watching the stars?

Super stressed this week with the outing... Time's running out! ack! Really appreciate the help that Renjie, Meiju and Baoqin gave... Don't know what I'll do without you all.. Serious... Now.. need to straighten out the arrangements... Hahaha...

Bleahz.. it's gonna be another of those nights.. whereby I'll toss and turn cause I can't get the thoughts out of my head... It's late.. almost 4.10... And I've been doing work.. as in more official stuff since 4 hours ago.. Winz... A lot of re-shuffling, strategies and stuff... urgh! Not very friendly...

I'm super messed up now.. Why Sentosa and not East Coast? I also don't know... WHY??? HELP!!! I need to take a breather... Going cycling tomorrow... I need it...

On a happier note.. spoke to a fren... just enjoyed the conversation whining, bitching, complaining... and basically just talking to her though the connection over Skype was kinda bad.. hahaha...

I'm kind of pissed.. I'm supposed to have a project meeting now.. but a lot of people haven't done their research yet... Sheeeeeetttttt lar... I hate it when people in your groups don't coorperate... As in this wasn't like a last min thing... areas were assigned like 2 WEEKS ago!!! You mean everyone is so busy that they don't have time to do research? What about ppl like me who stayed up to compile then (Ok.. i was also playing games.. but I don't think that is the point!) Excuses like Internet was down.. things like that... Gets on my nerves sometimes.. plus I'm sleepy and hungry now...

I hate in when I'm in a group when the people are like super off... And i feel like i'm in 2 of it now... Sianz...

I've been in a 'Stress Gillian out' mood the last few days.. putting pressure on myself to study demo, social psych cause I realised I haven't touched anything since start of school... Superb! I'm trying to turn myself from Slacker to Mugger in 1 sec flat.. which obviously doesn't work cause I'm bloggign instead of studying despite the fact that I have readings to do, AS homework to attempt, it is 12.30 am at night and I have 830 lessons tmr... Sheesh! I need to get my priorities right!

I'm starting to put pressure on myself cause I realise my mid terms are coming. Maybe doing decently well last term has made me mor ecomplacent... I wasn't that hardworking last term.. but at least I understand what is going on. This term, I feel like I'm just floating from class to class, lesson to lesson, not absorbing much. Maybe it is because I don't really like what I'm doing this term. Or I haven't grew to like it.

Did some quick research for democracy tmr so that Iwon't be like a dumb idiot when we talk about electoral systems.. I actually think it is interesting... Yeah.. i think I'm kinda nuts.. but if I have the time to read them and go thruough them carefully, I think it can be interesting... I need to do less stupid things online and actually do work!

I stayed in sch till 9 today... CT project stretched ALL the way from 1 to 6. and we still haven't gotten the container done... sucks leh... but I still like our idea... Yeah... trying not to admit defeat here... Sighz.. after all the hard work put in, 80% completed, the last 20% had to screw up... hahaha... Tomorrow will be a better day.

Bogged down by the planning of social science outing too.. Don't exactly regret taking it up.. but it is hard to coordinate 5 persons... So it sucks.. but I think today's meeting was quite productive... I just hope things will go as planned.. after all, it is the 1st 'big' even to be organised by SSS... I think I'm just killing myself slowly... On week 7, I have CT presentation, Democracy test, Social Psych test and the outing is on the Sat that week... This is just so wonderful!!1

Ahhh!!! I have 5 days next week during CNY... Muggerhood.. here I come!!!

Oh... I'm going to get the result of the MAPP Personality test I took 2 weeks ago tomorrow... Kinda excited.. though I'm too tired to feel it now...

Shall try and understand a bit more democracy.. then it is going off to dreamland.... I shall do AS tmr during democracy... Mwahahaha....